“…Shukar, shukar, shukar.. chullo, let’s go”
Gratitude.
This is what screams out to me from mums life. She was always so grateful for everything.
She never complained about not having enough, and made sure we didn’t grow up entitled. She took every thing as a blessing.
How she was raised, reflected in how she lived.
She saw the opportunity to serve, to give, and to be thankful for each moment.
There’s a beautiful video of mum where she gives us an insight into how she was raised in the beautiful little city of Saharanpur in India.
Losing her dad at the age of about 5/6 years old, and then being raised by a single mum in India with 2 other sisters, in an ultra conservative environment and very little resources to their disposal, I honestly have no idea how she survived, let alone thrived.
It made her who she was. It made her instil that within us.
One of her favourite songs which I loved hearing her sing was “Kiddha karan me shukariya, dathaar there ehsaan da”, and it was a song that would go on to become part and parcel of her life.
There is a line within this song
“Tu bakshi hai menu zindagi, meh kyu na kara teri bandagi?”
You have granted me this life, why would I not praise you?
Tu mareez raazi karditheh jithe nuskaa na chaleya lukmaan da”
You have healed where a doctors medicine has failed”
I remember when she was diagnosed with cancer in 2016/17, she kept saying that “don’t worry. There is still lots more to do, so much more service to give”. It was that purposeful giving that gave her motivation, energy, focus to remain healthy and keep giving.
If you ask me, it was during that year that mum had died and was then reborn into a new woman, with a renewed zeal and energy to give.
And it felt like we had a new mum!!
There was this one incident, that my niece Tania recalled;
While sat with Queen B for her first chemo, the nurse put the cannula in and started discussing the schedules for her treatment, initially the nurse said she would have the chemo at the end of the week, to which Queen B said “‘”would I feel the full side effects by Sunday though?”
To which the nurse replies “Yes”
So being the queen she is, aunty then said, could I have my chemo on Mondays instead so I have the week to recover and I can still do my sewa?
The nurse in me was like OMG but then my heart and soul realised just how pure she is and her soul breathed for selfless service, we did nimaskar to each other and did simran as the chemo commenced. In all my years of nursing I have never seen such courage and bravery in someone always wanting to give to everyone else.
Mum was the epitome of gratitude, and within that gratitude, the epitome of giving.
Being able to be like this is an art.
And she was the Da Vinci.
She rose above her physical experience, became the spiritual being, and just had the human experience.
Kya jeevan mum, kya bhagti…
He took me everywhere with him, whether that was the cash and carry, the park, warehouses for shop stock, relatives houses, friends’ houses, the social club; we had fun. 
Diary of a Dazed Dad 